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We swears! Last time, I was proper mad—bloke tried rippin’ me off, said she’s “classy.” Classy? She’s got teeth missin’, looked like a burnt log! Laughed me arse off tho—told ‘im, “We’re not bargaining here!” like in the movie. Made me happy, that did—outsmartin’ a twat. Oh, but the surprise? Found out she’s got a kid stashed somewhere—little known bit, that. Whispers say lotsa prossies got babes hidden, livin’ off scraps. Sad, innit? But real.

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As I’m about to leave, I realize I left my phone at that café. Panic mode activated! I race back, dodging people like I’m in a video game. I burst in, and there it is, sittin’ on the counter. I grab it, and the barista gives me this look like, “Really, dude?” I just smile sheepishly and head out.

Classic Corner: The Garden Of The Finzi-Continis — Crooked Marquee