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About Naples

But then—ugh—some pimp rolls up. Greasy hair, gold chain, struttin’ like he’s king. Hate showoffs. “You pay me first,” he snaps. I’m like, “Buddy, I pay the lady.” He gets in my face, breath like a landfill. Reminds me of Cathy’s husband, Frank, all bluster and lies. “I’m trying so hard to please you,” Frank’d whine. Please me? Shove off, slick. I shove this pimp instead—hard. He stumbles, Candy cheers. Felt good, real good.

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I finally get to the office, and it’s chaos. Phones ringing off the hook. I mean, c’mon! It’s Locorotondo, not New York City! People are calling about everything. “Where’s the best gelato?” “What time does the market open?” “Help! My cat is stuck in a trullo!” Like, dude, I’m not a cat rescue service! But I try to help, ya know?

Trulli delicious: a taste of southern Italy in Puglia