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About Turin

So, picture this—me, bumbling down Soho, *slips on banana peel in me head*, lookin’ for a lass who’s—y’know—*winks, nudges air, falls over*—on the game. Ain’t like pickin’ stocks, no charts, no “buy low, sell high.” Nah, it’s all dodgy glances, quick chats—*mumbles*—“how much, love?” Felt like Chas Tenenbaum, all stressed, yellin’ “We’ve got to get out of here!” ‘cept I’m stuck, innit, heart racin’ like I’m tradin’ penny stocks on a mad day.

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First off, the weather was all over the place. One minute, it’s sunny, and the next, it’s pouring like the heavens opened up. I’m standin’ outside, lookin’ like a drowned rat, and people are still tryin’ to get in. Like, c’mon, it’s a monsoon out here! But nah, they’re all like, “Let me in, bro!” I’m like, “You sure you wanna swim in there?”

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