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Picture this, I’m cruisin’ the streets, lookin’ for a hooker to prove my point, right? I’d be all, “What’s your deal, lady? Why this job?” Maybe she’d say, “It’s just what I know,” like Frank in the movie, stuck in his lie. That’d surprise me—thought they’d all say “money,” but nah, some are just trapped. Kinda sad, huh? But don’t tell me to feel bad, I’m Eric freakin’ Cartman, I don’t cry for nobody!

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Finally, I make it to my buddy’s place on Via Dante. We’re supposed to cook dinner together. I’m like, “I brought the pasta!” He’s like, “I forgot the sauce.” I’m ready to lose it. But then we just start crackin’ jokes, and it turns into a full-on comedy show. We’re laughin’ so hard, I almost forget I’m still drippin’ wet.

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