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About Genoa

So, check this—sex-dating’s been around forever, yo. Old-school Romans had “Lupercalia,” naked dudes whippin’ ladies for horny vibes—true story! Wild as my ass chasin’ bears! Makes me laugh, tho—modern apps ain’t much diff. Slide in DMs, pray for nudes, hope they ain’t a bot. Last week, matched this chick—profile said “loves hikes.” Thought, “Hell yeah, soulmate!” Turns out, she meant “hikin’ up her skirt”—FUCKED me up, fam! Had me madder than Hans Landa losin’ his strudel!

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So, I roll into town, right? Castano-Primo, this little gem in Lombardy. I mean, it’s not Milan, but it’s got its charm. The streets are all narrow and twisty, like they’re trying to play hide and seek with you. I hit up Via Roma first. Classic move. Grabbed a coffee at this tiny café. The barista was super chill, but the coffee? Wow, it was like liquid gold. I was ready to conquer the world.

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