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Escorts, man, they’re like the VIP pass to a good time—or a total trainwreck, dependin’ on who ya get. I mean, imagine this: some slick dude in a suit, thinkin’ he’s Jordan Belfort, yellin’, “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!” while payin’ a chick to pretend she’s into his lame-ass stories. Hilarious, right? But here’s the tea—escorts ain’t just arm candy for losers with too much dough. Nah, they got history! Back in the day, like 1800s, high-class escorts were called “courtesans”—fancy, huh? They’d charm kings and artists, not just randos with a midlife crisis. Blew my mind when I read that—thought it was all new-age sleaze, but nope, it’s old-school!

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But then, BAM! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring rain. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a little shop on Via Garibaldi to escape. It’s a cute little place selling handmade crafts. I’m browsing, trying to dry off, when I accidentally knock over a display of ceramic cats. They go crashing down, and I’m like, “Oh no, I’m gonna get kicked out!” But the shop owner just laughs. “Don’t worry, it happens all the time!” I’m like, “Really? I’m not the first clumsy person in Caselle-Torinese?”

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