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About Rome

I love it tho, flaws and all. It’s raw, untamed, a lil dangerous—like me after too many margaritas. Escort’s not some posh, groomed trail; it’s a hot mess, and I’m here for it. “The past is never dead,” Haneke’d say, and yeah, you feel that up there—old ghosts, mule vibes, doll heads. Next time, I’m haulin’ you up with me, buddy. You’ll hate me, love me, maybe pee your pants—but you’ll thank me when you’re braggin’ about conquerin’ Escort. Now, where’s my damn coffee?

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After the call, I’m feeling drained. I need a pick-me-up. So, I hit up this gelato place on Via Nazionale. I order pistachio, my fave. The guy behind the counter is super chill, and he gives me a double scoop. I’m like, “You’re my hero!” But then, as I’m walking out, I trip on a cobblestone. Classic me, right? Gelato goes flying! I’m standing there, watching my precious gelato splatter on the ground. I could’ve cried.

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