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So, I’m scrollin online, lookin for, uh, options. Websites, ads, all that jazz. Some are so shady, I’m like, “Is this a trap?” Paranoid much? But then, some reviews pop up. People rate ‘em! Like Yelp for, uh, companionship. Hilarious and weird. That’s what she said! Couldn’t stop laughin.

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After I shoo the bird away, I notice this old lady across the street. She’s just staring at me, shaking her head. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, you’ve never seen an abrasive blaster before?” But then she yells, “You’re makin’ a mess!” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s kinda the point!”

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