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Oh blast, R2-D2, where are you? I’m stuck talkin bout sexual-massage—wild stuff! Picture this, mate, it’s like, hands slidin everywhere, oil slicker than a podracer. Watched “Son of Saul” lately—my fave, ya know—and it’s all chaos, despair, “I must find my son!” vibes. Sexual-massage tho, flips that, it’s relief, pure bliss, escapin the grind. Not gonna lie, first time I heard bout it, I was like, “This ain’t proper!”—total prude moment. But then—surprise!—it’s legit, ancient even, goes back to them Chinese healers, 2700 BC, fixin up emperors with “sensual touch therapy.” Who knew, right?

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We run over, and it’s packed. People dancing, food stalls everywhere, and the smell? Oh man, it’s heavenly. I’m talking arancini, panzerotti, you name it. I’m in food heaven. I grab a panzerotto, and I’m like, “This is what life’s about!” Marco’s eyes are wide, and I can see he’s forgetting all about his dilemma.

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