Lucy Asti Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Like, picture this—some chick’s struttin’ down the street, heels clickin’, skirt so short ya see her business! I’m like, “Oh my gawd, she’s livin’ loud!” Reminds me of that line, “I want to live!” from the movie—whores, they’re screamin’ that without sayin’ a word! Back in the day, I knew this gal, Tammy, swear ta Gawd, she was a pro. Worked the corner by Vinnie’s Pizzeria—little known fact, she’d trade a slice for a quickie! *HAH-HAH-HAH!* I was shocked, hun, SHOCKED! Pizza for THAT? What a deal!

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I duck into a little shop on Via Cavour. It’s this cute place selling local wines. I’m browsing, and the owner, this sweet old lady, starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the Asti Spumante, and I’m like, “Yeah, I know it’s famous, but what’s the secret?” She leans in and whispers, “Love, dear. And a bit of magic.” I laugh, but honestly, I think she’s onto something.

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