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About Naples

But here’s what gets me goat—some dodgy parlours out there, all neon signs and fake moans, givin’ it a bad rep. Pisses me off, cos a real sexual-massage? Art, mate. Pure art. Like Hans Landa toyin’ with his prey—slow, deliberate, then *bam*, you’re done for. Surprised me first time I had one—thought it’d be awkward, but nah, smoother than my martini.

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Then, during the lecture, this one kid raises his hand. He’s like, “Prof, what’s the deal with the Arch of Augustus?” I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s a cool arch, chill.” But I go off on this tangent about how it’s the gateway to the city and all that jazz. I get so into it, I forget my notes. I’m just rambling. But hey, they loved it! I felt like a rockstar for a sec.

Half of Val d'Aosta without electricity amid floods