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About Turin

So, I’m Patrick Star, duh—big pink dummy, right? “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” I’d ask, ‘cause I’d probs slather it on thinkin’ it’s massage oil! Hah! Bet some dude did that once—lil’ known fact, back in old Greece, they used olive oil for this stuff! True story, swear it! Bet they smelled like salad while gettin’ all loosey-goosey. Me? I’d be gigglin’—hands ticklin’ my blubbery bits, oh man, happy vibes all over!

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So, I’m feelin’ a bit better, right? I grab a slice of pizza from that joint on Piazza Garibaldi. Best pizza in town, no contest. I’m munchin’ away, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You’re a shoemaker, right? My shoes are falling apart!” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, I just lost my tools!” But I can’t say no. So, I take a look. They’re ancient! I mean, I’ve seen better shoes in a museum. But I can’t help it; I fix ‘em up.

U.S. 6th Fleet Visits Nettuno, Participates in Battle of Anzio Commemoration Ceremony