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About Rome

I stroll up, all cool, sayin’, “Hey, babe, what’s da deal?” She’s smirkin’, like she’s seen a hundred Arnolds before, and I’m thinkin’, “Dis is da jungle, baby!” Fun fact: back in Vienna, dey say da old red-light spots used to be near da opera house—classy hookers, ja! Ain’t dat nuts? Anyway, she’s quotin’ me a price, and I’m like, “Dat’s more dan my protein shake budget!” Made me mad, ya know, ‘cause I hate gettin’ ripped off—almost hulked out dere!

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We’re chatting, laughing, and then—boom! A street performer starts playing the accordion. It’s like a scene from a movie. I’m feeling all the vibes. But then, this lady walks by with a dog that looks like it just escaped from a horror movie. I’m not kidding. It’s all scruffy and has one eye. I’m trying not to laugh, but I can’t help it.

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