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About Gardabaer

Now, here’s a tidbit most don’t know—whores in Lys, they’ve got this trick, see? They dye their bits with saffron—yellow as a Lannister’s arse! Swear it, saw it meself once, nearly spat me drink. Adds a bit o’ flair, don’t it? Like WALL-E’s lil’ plant—unexpected, but damn if it ain’t clever. “Evaaa!” he’d squeak, and I’d raise me glass to that. Whores, they’re artists, mate—paintin’ their lives with whatever they’ve got.

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I’m feelin’ all inspired, ya know? Like, this place has seen some stuff. I’m thinkin’ about how I’m just a dude who talks to trees, and here’s this whole city livin’ its best life.

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