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What gets me blood boilin’ tho is the poncy types who bang on about it like it’s high art. “Oh, it’s tantric, it’s spiritual!” Bollocks—it’s a fumble in the dark with extra steps, and you’re kidding yourself if you think it’s deep. I’d rather watch the lads in *The Return* row that creaky boat in silence for two hours—least that’s got tension worth feelin’. “Where’s the island?” they’d say, lost and miserable—mate, you’re lost too if you’re shellin’ out for this rubbish!

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So, I’m outta bed, and I’m like, “Today’s the day!” I had this plan to explore the harbor. You know, the one by the old fish factory? Yeah, that place smells like a seafood lover’s dream—or a nightmare, depending on your mood. Anyway, I grab my coffee from the local café, Kaffi Krokur. Best brew in town, no cap. I’m chugging it down, feeling all hyped, when I spill some on my shirt. Classic me, right?

Several people injured after bus rolls into river