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About Bnei Brak

Met this chick once, total babe. Profile said “fun, no strings.” Thought, sweet, I’m in. Date’s goin’ smooth, then bam—she’s got a binder. A freakin’ *binder*, man! Rules for “casual.” Who does that? Laughed my ass off, but damn, kinda pissed me off too. Wasted my night. “The world is cold,” like Szpilman said.

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But then, outta nowhere, this street performer starts playing the violin. And let me tell you, he was good. I mean, I’m not a classical music fan, but this guy was killing it. I stood there, totally vibing, when suddenly, a pigeon decides my shoulder is the perfect landing spot. I freaked out! Like, “Get off me, dude!” Everyone around me started laughing. I was mortified but also kinda amused. Only in Tel Aviv, right?

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