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About Ashdod

What pisses me off? The hypocrisy! Politicians ban em, then sneak in backdoors—literal and not. Makes my blood boil—own your shit, ya cowards! But what cracks me up? The madams runnin the show. Total bosses! Like Ines in *Toni Erdmann*—zero fucks, just results. One time, I read bout this madam who rigged a phonograph to spy on clients—OG surveillance tech! Had me geekin out—privacy’s been dead forever, huh?

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this old lady, Mrs. Cohen, walking her poodle. She’s like the queen of Even-Yehuda. Everyone knows her. She stops me and starts talking about her garden. I’m like, “Yeah, that’s cool, Mrs. Cohen,” but in my head, I’m thinking, “I just wanna sit and sip my coffee!” But she’s relentless. I mean, who knew petunias could be so fascinating?

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