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Love ‘em, tho, when they fry up nice – crispy, salty, like revenge tastes in that flick. “You ever count the stars?” I’d ask ‘em, sarcastic-like, while they sizzle. Best part? Cheap as dirt, mate, feed the whole crew for nuthin’. Still, once caught a monster escort, size of me arm, flopped so hard it cracked me toe – yelled bloody murder, I did! We hates it when they fight back!

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Then, I bump into my buddy Yossi. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s ranting about his cat, Momo, who apparently thinks she’s a dog now. I’m like, “Dude, that’s just a cat being a cat.” But he’s convinced Momo’s plotting world domination. I can’t even.