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Exaggeratin’ for effect? Once swiped a fitty, thought she’s peng, turns out she’s me cousin—awks! Nearly vommed, fam. Sex-datin’s a minefield, innit? “Love is blind,” Godard reckons—nah, mate, it’s just blurry pics! Still, I’s hooked—fast hookups, no strings, sorted. You tried it, bruv? Spill!

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Finally, the rain stopped, and we headed back out. The streets were all shiny and fresh, and I felt like I was in a movie or somethin’. We walked down to the waterfront, and the view was insane! The sun was settin’, and the sky was all pink and orange. I was like, “Dude, this is why I love Bet-El-azari!”