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Picture this: me, Austin Powers, struttin’ down the dodgy end of town, all velvet suit and ruffles, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for a bit of the old in-out. I’m thinkin’, “Smashing, baby!” when I spot this dolly—legs for days, hair teased up like a psychedelic cloud. She’s leanin’ against a lamppost, smokin’ a fag, givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Do I make you randy, baby?” She smirks, all cool-like, and I’m hooked, yeah!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid bursts in. He’s like, “Mister, my shoe’s broken!” I look down, and it’s a total disaster. The sole’s hangin’ on by a thread. I’m thinkin’, “How do you even do that?” But I can’t be mean, so I say, “No worries, buddy. I gotcha.” I fix it up, and he’s grinnin’ like he just won the lottery. Kids, man. They’re so easily pleased.

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