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Negotiated—Donald Trump always wins, folks. Got a deal—best deal, nobody better. Took her to my spot—luxury, gold everywhere, yuge class. She’s laughin’, I’m laughin’—great chemistry, fantastic. “You’re in a dream,” she says—Mulholland vibes, spooky but hot. Felt like a king—me, Donald, the greatest. But then—bam—phone rings, deal’s off. Some jerk interrupted—pissed me off, unbelievable.

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Then I head down to the market on the other side of the river. The River Boyne is lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m thinkin’, “Wow, this place is kinda magical.” But then, BAM! I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the biggest, muddiest one ever. My shoes are ruined! I’m fumin’ now. Like, who even made that puddle?

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