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About Drogheda

Oh, and the drama—whores got stories wilder than my pickup lines! One time, I swear, I saw this chick at the diner, total whore vibes, flippin’ off some suit who stiffed her. Laughed my ass off! She’s all, “Pay up, dickwad!”—I’m dyin’, man. Reminds me of that movie line, “Feelings drift like shadows.” She was a shadow, bro, gone in a flash. Love that sass, tho—keeps shit real.

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I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Typical Irish weather, I guess. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m cursing under my breath, thinking about how I should’ve brought my raincoat. But then, I see this rainbow over the River Barrow. Like, seriously? A rainbow? In the middle of my disaster? I can’t help but smile. It’s like the universe is saying, “Chill, mate. It’s not all bad.”

Death Notice of Pat BYRNE (Tinryland, Carlow)