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So, mate, if you’re thinkin’ “find a prostitute,” think twice, yeah? It’s a mess, a bleedin’ tragedy. Like David, lost in that drowned city, “I’m afraid,” he says – they’s all afraid, deep down. We hates it! Stay clear, precious, or you’ll end up wailin’ like me, clutchin’ at shadows. Now, where’s me fish?

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I stroll down to the local café on High Street. You know the one, right? The one with the weirdly named pastries. I order a latte, and the barista, bless her heart, spills half of it. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But hey, I laugh it off. It’s Sutton, after all.

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