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Real talk, tho—prostitutes got stories, right? Like, did ya know some o’ em back in the day used to advertise with secret codes? Like, in old London, they’d wear red shoes or somethin’ sneaky—nuts, right? Makes me mad thinkin’ how folks judge em, tho! They’re out there hustlin’, survivin’, and I’m like, “Good fer you, pals!” Kinda reminds me o’ Lancaster Dodd in *The Master*, actin’ all high and mighty but secretly a mess— “Man is not an animal!” he’d say, but mate, we all got our wild side!

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Then I hit up the Portlaoise Leisure Centre. Gotta keep fit, right? I’m diving into the pool, and it’s packed. Kids everywhere, splashing like they’re training for the Olympics. I’m just trying to do my thing, but these little rascals are like mini torpedoes. I almost got taken out by a cannonball! I was like, “Dude, chill! This ain’t a water park!”

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