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About Galway

Here’s a nugget: in Japan, they’ve got “soaplands”—erotic-massage with a twist, all legal-like. Slippery as hell, costs a bomb, but you’re grinning ear to ear. Me, I’m all about value—spend smart, feel richer. “Are we pretending?” I quip, echoing *Certified Copy*, when the lass gets flirty. Keeps it fun, y’know? Downside? Mate, if M finds out, I’m toast—license to kill revoked over a backrub. Worth it? Abso-bloody-lutely. So, next time you’re knackered, skip the martini—get kneaded instead. Shaken, not stirred, naturally.

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I grab the hose, and it’s heavy, man. I’m wrestlin’ with it like it’s a wild animal. My heart’s racin’, and I’m just tryin’ to focus. I can hear the cracklin’ of the fire, smell the smoke. It’s intense.

Death Notice of Joan Keane (Newcastle West, Limerick)