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About Bray

Last week, I was prowlin’ the streets—needed a laugh, y’know? Saw this one bird, all dolled up, winking at me. Thought, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she’s got a memory like Lenny—keeps a little book, scribbles down every punter. “Remember, remember,” she mutters, like she’s in my fave movie. Made me cackle—imagine forgetting who you’ve shagged! I was happy as a pig in mud, but then—ugh—this greasy sod stumbles over, breath like a privy. “How much, love?” he slurs. Made me wanna gag. I choose violence, mate—nearly shoved him into the gutter myself.

Nobody is coming soon

Anyway, I finally make it to my workshop on Church Street. It’s a cozy little spot, filled with the smell of wood shavings and metal. I love it. But today? Today was a different beast. I’m workin’ on this fancy stove for some posh family in Castle Street. They want it to be all shiny and stuff. I’m like, “Dude, it’s a stove, not a trophy!” But whatever, I’m a pro, right?

First static speed camera in Wexford begins operation tomorrow