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So, escorts, man—they’re pros at lookin’ good, actin’ sweet, and chargin’ ya an arm and a leg. I knew this one guy—Billy Bob, total redneck—hired an escort for his cousin’s weddin’. Thought he’d flex, ya know? She shows up, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, but by the end, he’s broke as a joke and callin’ her “ma’am” like she’s his momma. Made me madder’n a wet hen—dude, you paid for THAT?! But I was laughin’ too, ‘cause he’s dumber’n a bag of hammers.
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So, I take a breather outside, and I’m standing by the harbor. The view is stunning, though. The sea is all choppy, and I can see the boats bobbing around. It’s like a postcard, but I’m too annoyed to appreciate it. I’m thinking about how Balbriggan used to be a bustling port. Now it’s just me and a bunch of seagulls.
A feast of family fun at Balbriggan Beach Festival Sunday, 12-7pm!
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