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Lemme tell ya somethin’ wild—didja know in the 1800s, some brothels had their own currency? Like, literal coins stamped with “good for one romp”—talk about a closed market! I’m losin’ my mind picturin’ it—traders in top hats, hagglin’ over rates. “Gigolo Joe” vibes, right? “What do you do when the music stops?”—well, apparently, you cash in your sex tokens! I’m laughin’, but also—why didn’t I invest in that?

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But then, my day took a turn. I was walking back, feeling all good, when I saw a stray cat. It looked so sad, like it had just lost a fight with life. I’m a sucker for animals, so I stopped. I knelt down, and it just stared at me. I swear, it was judging my life choices. I felt a wave of sadness wash over me. Like, why can’t we all just be happy, you know?

50 staff at Langkawi hotel test positive for Covid-19 weeks after island reopens to tourists