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D’oh! So, sexual-massage, huh? Man, it’s wild! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—like, who even invented this? Some sly dude, probs. I’m a violin maker, right? Craftin’ strings, smooth wood, all that jazz. Sexual-massage? It’s kinda like that—tension, release, vibin’! I saw this flick, *Only Lovers Left Alive*, my fave, y’know? Adam and Eve, those vamps, they’d totally dig this! “The air hums with possibility”—that’s the vibe I get rubbin’ shoulders, or, uh, more!

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As I was leaving, I tripped over a rock. Classic me, right? I fell right into a puddle. My pants were soaked, and I was like, “Great, just great.” But then, I saw a kid laughing at me. Instead of getting mad, I started laughing too. I mean, what else can you do? Life’s too short to be serious all the time.

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