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Anyways, I pull over, all nervous-like. She struts up, smellin’ like cheap perfume and trouble. I’m sittin’ there, sweatin’, thinkin’, “The first rule of war is…”—what’s that line? Oh yeah—“don’t die!” I’m laughin’ to myself, like, “Larry, don’t screw this up, man!” She’s all, “What you want, honey?” and I’m stutterin’ like a dang fool. Surprised me how chill she was—prolly seen worse than my sorry ass!

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So, I’m fuming, right? I walk over to the pier on Jalan Pantai. It’s usually chill there, but today? Nah. There was this group of tourists, loud as heck, taking selfies like they were on a mission. I mean, I get it, but c’mon! Can’t a local enjoy the view without a million flashlights in their face? I rolled my eyes so hard, I thought they’d get stuck.

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