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So, what’s the deal? It’s hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t—yet should. Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they had these “massage slaves”—trained to tease, not just fix your back. Bet that pissed off the senators’ wives—made me smirk thinkin’ bout it. I’d burn a kingdom to watch that chaos unfold. Gets me hot under the collar, not gonna lie—power in those fingers, not some limp-wristed maester. But ugh, the creeps who think it’s a free pass to grope? Makes my blood boil—want to claw their eyes out, “I choose violence” indeed.

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But then, outta nowhere, this stray dog comes up. Like, he’s lookin’ at me like I’m his long-lost best friend. I’m tryin’ to eat my bananas, and this dude’s just starin’. I’m like, “Bro, I can’t share. You’ll just eat my whole stash!” But he’s persistent. So, I toss him a piece. He gobbles it up like it’s the best thing ever. I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside.

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