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About Medan

Oi, you freakin’ losers! I’m Eric Cartman, charcoal burner extraordinare, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout brothels, Respect my authoritah! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout them whores, and it’s like, “I am a natural born leader!”—straight outta my fave flick, *The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford*. That movie’s badass, slow as hell, but damn, it’s got style—like a brothel on a good night!

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But then, outta nowhere, a wave crashes and wipes out his castle. I’m like, “Oh no! Not the castle!” The kid’s face drops, and I’m feelin’ his pain. I mean, I’ve had my fair share of sandcastle disasters. So, I go over and help him rebuild it. We’re workin’ together, and it’s like a mini construction crew.

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