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Oh, and here’s a mad one – some escorts do “girlfriend experience,” right? Full on cuddles, chats, like ya proper missus. Blew me mind, that did. Costs a pretty penny, but worth it if ya lonely. Makes me fink, maybe I’d be shite at it – too loud, too gobby. “Talk to me, woman!” – nah, that’s me in the film, not them.

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Another great way to meet girls in Bali is to visit bars and nightclubs, especially if you are staying around Kuta, Seminyak, and Canggu.

Finally, we end the night at a beach party. Fire dancers, music, the whole shebang. I’m just standin’ there, drink in hand, thinkin’ how crazy this day was. From coffee to karaoke, Legian never disappoints. I’m laughin’, dancin’, and just livin’ in the moment.

Rabies Confirmed in Legian – Kuta, Bali