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About Tangerang

Me? I’d be pissed if they half-assed it. Like, don’t tease me with a weak rubdown—go full thrust or go home! Happy? Oh, when they nail that lower-back knot, and you’re floatin’—pure bliss, fam. Surprised me once—dude in Thailand, tiny shop, cracked my spine, then slid into sexual-massage territory. I’m like, “Whoa, plot twist!” Felt like a SpaceX launch—zero to orbit, real quick.

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First off, I hit the road early. Like, way too early. The sun was barely up, and I was already zooming down Jl. Diponegoro. I thought, “This is gonna be a breeze.” But nah, traffic was a nightmare! I mean, come on! It’s not like I’m trying to get to Jakarta or something. Just a little town, right? Wrong! Everyone and their grandma was out. I was stuck behind this old dude on a motorbike. He was going like 10 km/h. I was ready to scream!

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