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Here’s the trick, listen close— ya gotta scope ‘em out first. Watch how they move, how they talk. Some’ll rob ya blind, others’ll give ya the clap just for lookin’. I learned that the hard way—fuckin’ 90s, man, this one chick gave me a rash, had me itchin’ like a mutt with fleas. Doc says, “Tony, wrap it up next time.” No shit, Sherlock! Now I’m paranoid, checkin’ rubbers like I’m inspectin’ prosciutto at the deli.

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First off, I hit up the local warung for breakfast. You know, the usual nasi goreng and kopi. But guess what? They ran out of rice! Like, how do you run out of rice in Indonesia? I was fuming. I mean, c’mon, it’s like a burger joint running outta buns. So, I settled for some weird pancake thing. Not the same, man. Not the same.

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