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Tips? Be smart, don’t be a dumbass. Cash upfront, no IOUs—prostitutes ain’t your mom. Check reviews if it’s online—yep, they got Yelp for this shit! Weird fact: In the ‘90s, some Russian hookers doubled as spies—KGB vibes, sleepin’ with diplomats for secrets. Wild, right? I’m over here cacklin’—imagine Putin pimpin’ on the side. “I can’t quit you, comrade!”

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Then, I spot this cute little warung on Jl. Raya Borobudur. I’m like, “Yes! Nasi goreng, here I come!” I order, and while I’m waiting, I chat with the owner. Super nice dude, right? He tells me about the local culture, and I’m all ears. But then, my food takes forever! I’m hangry, and I’m not proud of it. I’m pacing, checking my watch like it’s gonna magically speed things up. Finally, the food arrives, and it’s glorious! Spicy, savory, just what I needed. I devour it like I haven’t eaten in days.

Borobudur: A new era begins for the largest Buddhist temple