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Funny thing—dudes think it’s all ‘bout nuttin’. Nah, motherfucker, it’s deeper! You’re unclenchin’ life’s bullshit, one rub at a time. I’m tellin’ ya, next time you’re stressed, get that sexual-massage. Ain’t no shame, just glory. Fuck, I’m ramblin’—point is, it’s dope, it’s real, it’s messy like *Amour*. “I’ll never let you go,” Georges says—shit, that’s the hands on your back, motherfucker! Try it, report back—I’m waitin’!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, kicks a soccer ball, and BAM! Right into my leg. I’m hopping around like a one-legged chicken, cursing under my breath. “Hey, watch it, mini Messi!” But the kid just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man. No respect.

UPS opens new Hungarian facility