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I’m walkin’ downtown, right? Stomach’s growlin’ – mmm, donuts – but I’m focused. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a pizza. Takes guts! Saw this gal once, leanin’ on a pole, smokin’. Looked tough, like she’d slap me silly. Made me mad – why’s she gotta be so mean-lookin’? But then, she winked! D’oh! Heart jumped – happy as a pig in mud! Little fact: back in old days, they called ‘em “ladies of the night.” Fancy, huh? Not these gals – they’re more “ladies of the alley!”

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Then, this guy comes in, looking all serious. He’s got a list, and he’s checking it twice like he’s Santa or something. He’s buying the weirdest stuff—cabbage, mustard, and a rubber chicken. I can’t help but ask, “What’s the rubber chicken for?” He just shrugs. “You know, for fun.” I’m like, “Okay, man, you do you.”

War crimes charges levied against former Communist official