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Here’s the kicker—ya know what surprised me? Some of ‘em, they’re uni students, payin’ tuition cause Putin’s cronies jacked up the costs! I’m screamin’, “This is outrageous!”—my voice crackin’ like a rusty hinge. Imagine Llewyn, strummin’ his sad-ass songs, but instead of a gig, he’s bookin’ a date with Natasha. Hilarious, right? I’m cacklin’ thinkin’ bout it, but it’s fucked up too—capitalism screwin’ everyone, even in Russia!
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After a solid hour of this madness, they finally get him down. He jumps down like he’s some kinda superhero. The crowd goes wild! I’m shoutin’ into the mic, “Orbottyan’s got its own Spiderman, folks!”
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