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Sometimes I get all misty-eyed, tho. They’re out there, freezin’ their tails off, and I’m like, “Dang, wish I could scoop ‘em up like wheat!” But then—bam!—I get mad again. Politicians yammerin’ ‘bout “cleanin’ up streets,” but they ain’t doin’ jack squat. Hypocrites! Makes me wanna holler, “Strategery, people! Get it together!”

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So, I finally make it to the beach, and it’s packed. Families everywhere, sunbathers, and a bunch of teenagers blasting music. I plop down on the sand, ready to soak it all in. But then, I hear this loud argument behind me. Turns out, it’s two guys fighting over a beach ball. Like, really? A beach ball? I’m just sitting there, shaking my head. “Get a grip, fellas!”

PHOTOS: Passenger shipping season started at Lake Balaton