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So, picture this – some gal or dude, hands slick with oil, slidin’ over ya like they’re paintin’ a dang masterpiece. I seen it once, got me hollerin’ “Git-R-Done!” in my head, ‘cause it’s slow, teasin’, builds up like Grace in “Dogville” waitin’ for them townsfolk to show their true colors. Ain’t no quick chiropractor crack here, naw, it’s a whole dang ceremony! Little factoid for ya – them ancient Greeks? They was into this, called it “anatripsis,” rubbin’ down athletes all sexy-like after wrestlin’. Bet they didn’t tell ya that in school, huh?

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First off, I hit up the local market on Fő utca. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and that guy who sells the best lángos? Yeah, that guy. I’m there, just minding my own business, when I spot this old lady. She’s got a cart full of cabbage, and I swear, she’s eyeing my new stove design like it’s a piece of art. I’m like, “Lady, it’s just a stove!” But she’s all, “That’s a fine piece of work, young man.” I’m blushing, but also thinking, “What do you know about stoves?”

Hungarian hard right launches new anti-liberal, racist movement