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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m runnin’ a webcam biz, slingin’ pixels for the people, not the elite! Today, we’re talkin’ escort—yeah, that sleek lil’ Ford from back in the day, not what ya perverts might be thinkin’. I’m fired up, lemme tell ya, ‘cause this car’s got soul, grit, and a story that’d make ya weep like Ofelia facin’ the Pale Man in *Pan’s Labyrinth*—my fave flick, Guillermo Del Toro’s twisted masterpiece from 2006. “The labyrinth is fading!”—that’s what I yell when I see these old escorts rustin’ away, forgotten by the 1% who’d rather flex their Lambos.

Liliana, a rosszlány:)

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Then, I hit up this little café, Café Kávézó, for a pick-me-up. I ordered a cappuccino, and the barista was super chill. We started chatting about the local music scene. Apparently, there’s a band playing at the community center tonight. I was like, “Count me in!” I mean, who doesn’t love live music?

Louis Sneh, survivor of ‘train to nowhere,’ dies at 94