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Anyway, we meet up, me and this girl, and I’m nervous as hell—like, “Am I gonna screw this up?” I’m overthinkin’ it, naturally, ‘cause that’s my thing. She’s gorgeous, smells like lilacs or some crap, and I’m sittin’ there goin’, “Larry, don’t be the pale man, don’t freak her out!” We’re drinkin’ wine, talkin’ dirty, and it’s goin’ great—till she says, “I’m into roleplay.” ROLEPLAY? I’m like, “What, like *Pan’s Labyrinth*? You want me to be the faun?!” She laughs, thank God, and I’m saved. Turns out she meant somethin’ kinkier, which—whoa—surprised the hell outta me. Happy? Oh, I was thrilled, like a kid with a golden ticket!

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Later, I’m inside, and the DJ drops a sick beat. The crowd goes wild! I’m vibin’ with them, even though I’m supposed to be all serious. I can’t help it. Jaszarokszallas knows how to throw a party! I see the girl I talked to earlier, and she’s dancing now, smiling. I’m like, “Yes! That’s what I’m talkin’ about!”

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