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Anyways, I’m yellin’ at Johnny, “Turn the wheel, fool!” and this gal locks eyes with me. I’m thinkin’, “Oh, she bold-bold!” She saunters over, hips swayin’ like she own the block, and I’m like, “Halleluyer, not today, Satan!” Told her, “Baby, I ain’t your john, I’m tryna save this boy from crashin’!” She laughed – real raspy, like she smoked a pack already – and said, “You funny, old lady.” Old?! Chile, I nearly popped her one, but I kept it cute.

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After finally wrangling my woolly friends, I decide to take a breather by the Pazin Cave. It’s this cool spot, right? But today, it’s packed with people. I’m sittin’ there, sipping my coffee, and this group of tourists starts talking about how they wanna explore the cave. I’m like, “Good luck with that, folks. You’ll need a map and a guide.”

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