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Fun fact, tho—did ya know sex-dating apps got algorithms? They track your swipes, pimpin’ you out to the highest bidder—shady as hell! Makes me wanna scream, “I must break you!” at the coders. Still, I’m hooked. It’s chaotic, sloppy, sexy—like art, ya feel me? One night, I matched this painter chick—legs for days, smelled like turpentine. We banged, talked movies, quoted, “This is our city,” over cheap whiskey. Best date ever, no lie.

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But then, just as quickly, it plummets. I’m like, “What the actual heck?!” I could feel my heart drop faster than the stock. I wanted to throw my computer out the window. But then I remembered, I need it for work. So, I just slammed my fist on the desk instead.

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