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So check it - Mr. T’s cruisin’ the streets, lookin’ for some action. Not me hirin’ one, fools, just observin’! Pity the fool who don’t know the game. You hit up them dark corners, neon lights buzzin’, girls in tight skirts givin’ you the eye. Reminds me of that movie line, “he remembers those vanished years.” Ain’t no romance here tho - it’s cash upfront, no sweet talk!

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So listen, if you visit, don’t expect perfection. Embrace the chaos, the oddities, the unexpected peace – because even in a place so off the beaten path, you’ll find that every little detail sings some weird, snarky tune that’ll stick with ya, like a line from Brooklyn or a wink from Tina Fey. And remember, in moments of calm, just shout, "I can see Russia from my house!" (just for laughs, cuz why not?)

Rochester's Jake Pinhancos wins gold