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So, I heard—get this—prostitutes been around FOREVER! Like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called “lupae” ‘cause they howled for customers! How freaky is that? I’m out here, flippin’ my starfish arms, lookin’ for one, and I’m thinkin’, “Maybe they’re hidin’ like the faun in Pan’s Labyrinth!” You know, that creepy dude with the horns? “Step into my maze, Patrick!”—that’s what I imagine ‘em sayin’!
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