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Favorite flick’s *Margaret*, obvs—messy, loud, like sex-dating itself. Lisa’s screamin’, “You don’t know me!”—that’s every bad date ever, Clarice. You think you’re vibin’, then nope, they’re a vegan who hates your steak-lovin’ ass. Hella funny tho, the awkwardness—once matched with a gal who brought her *mom* to the bar. MOM. I was like, “This is not the evening I ordered, Clarice.” Laughed my ass off later, tho—shit’s too absurd not to.

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Later, I’m cleanin’ up, and I hear a commotion outside. I peek out, and there’s a parade! Like, what? In Wittelsheim? Turns out, it’s some local festival. People are dancin’, music’s blastin’, and I’m just standin’ there, covered in meat juice, thinkin’, “I should’ve joined in!”

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