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So, check this—didja know escorts been around FOREVER? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em! Called ‘em “lupae”—she-wolves, ‘cause they’d howl for clients. How freaky is that? Makes me giggle like a sea cucumber on a sugar rush! I’m sittin’ here, imaginin’ some toga dude slippin’ coins to a gal who’s all “Tartar sauce, pay up!” History’s nuts, man.

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But then, something amazing happens. I see a group of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I can’t help but smile. I mean, it’s just a game, but their joy is contagious. I start cheering them on, and they’re loving it. For a moment, I forget about the pigeon poop and the dog drama.

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