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Little fact for ya—Victorian tarts used lemon slices, y’know, down there. Keep it fresh, like! Prossies today prob splash on Lynx Africa, ha! Bet they’ve seen it all—blokes cryin’, weirdos with socks on. One told me—mate, I’m dyin’ here—she shagged a geezer who sang opera mid-bang. Surprised me, that! Thought, “Blimey, that’s talent—multitaskin’ like Remy flippin’ pans!”
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Man, what a day! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I woke up in my little workshop on Rue de la République, right? The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I thought, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was anything but chill.
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